Missing Him…or the Idea of Him?

Sometimes, late at night, I realize it's not really him I miss - it's the idea of him.

The holding hands.
The dinners out.
The "how was your day?" phone call.
The feeling of being held in someone's arms when the world feels heavy.

It's not about one particular person (truthfully, I know he wasn't right for me). It's about the experience of having someone show up, someone who wants to laugh, to plan things, to share life. That spark of connection that makes you feel alive again.

And I'll be honest, being single for years now has had its moments. I've gone on dates. I've given people chances. And yes, I believe you can grow into attraction, but deep down, I also believe we all know if we want to reach for that hand across the table.

Here's the truth: missing that closeness can make us do things we regret. It can make us choose wrong, say yes when we should say no, settle for less when we deserve more. Because we crave that connection so deeply.

But I remind myself of this:
💗 I was blessed to feel it once, and if it happened before, it can happen again.
💗 My life is still unfolding. Love is not reserved for the young.
💗 Hope is not naive. Hope is strength.

Will I meet someone again? I don't know. Will I be "the cat lady"? Maybe - but I'll be the happiest, most resilient cat lady around! What I do know is this: life is better when you keep your heart open, even after hurt.

So tonight, to anyone else who feels that same pang of loneliness, I want to say: you are not alone in missing "the idea of someone." But don't give up on the idea of hope either!

Because love, whether it's romantic, friendship, or self-love; always has a way of circling back.🩷

And just to be clear,this isn't about missing an ex-husband or longing for a marriage that ended (leaving was often the bravest, healthiest choice we ever made). This is about life after marriage, about dating, about those short sparks that didn't last and wondering, in this smaller pool, will that spark ever come again💕

💬 Share your thoughts in the comments on IG/Facebook or message me directly. I'd love to hear from you!