I cry at movies.
I cry at the theatre.
I cry when I hear a piece of music that moves me.
I cry when I see someone is hurting.
I cry when I hurt.
I cry when I'm scared.
I cry when I have big decisions to make.
I cry when I'm angry.
I cry when I'm happy. (There is definitely such thing as happy tears or tears of joy)
I cry when I'm expressing something that I'm passionate about.
…and this is the crying that I struggle with: the passionate expression of tears. Why? Because sometimes it's looked at as a form of weakness instead of the beautiful strength it represents and honest expression of raw emotion.
It's this crying that sometimes I wish I could control.
Because the one arena that crying seems to have no place is in the work environment. At work crying is seen as weak. A woman who cries at work is over emotional. She's not seen as passionate - creative. No, not at all. When a woman cries her message seems lost. That the ideas she's presenting get muddled. They could be valid concerns, brilliant contributions, but said through tears they will fall on deaf ears. Stoic. Yes, that's what you need to be, stoic.
Now I'm not suggesting that you have a cry fest everytime you dialogue with someone or are in the boardroom. What I am saying is that tears that flow freely are simply a further expression of who we are. It's a part of our emotional make-up. Some women have difficulty crying and others cry more easily. Those that don't cry are not necessarily stronger or better leaders. Crying is a form of self expression. For some, the tears just come. It's an automatic reflex.
Instead of looking at crying as a form of weakness, I really do think that we should accept tears for what they are - an extension of our character and our innate emotional makeup. Tears are neither good or bad nor do they determine strength or weakness. Tears just are.
So the next time I cry or someone I'm with cries, perhaps the reflection will be "That was such an honest expression of raw emotion" "There was no doubt in my mind the degree in which she is dedicated to the issue"
I just want to put a different spin on the whole idea of crying as a sign of weakness.
I don't want us to berate ourselves for "having a moment".
Heck, we are emotional beings, filled to the brim with ways of expressing those emotions and one of them is crying.
Let's embrace those tears. Just accept them for a part of who you are.
My tears are a part of who I am and I'm ok with that. At least I'm trying to be ok with that.