Blog - Guts, Grace and Gratitude

Over the past week or so I've been following one of my Facebook friend's posts about a life decision that she's made. She didn't share the particulars only that it was not an easy one to make and that she was following her intuition, inner guidance. This morning I learned that she is leaving for Costa Rica. I don't know what her plan is once she is there. But the post this morning on her Facebook page was hopeful. The start of a new chapter and she was grateful for the lessons learned in the past couple of years. I can relate.

I don't know this woman personally. We have mutual friends and I know we share some very similar views on life and living. She is younger than me, although I have no idea how old she actually is.

Today as I read her post, there was a part of me that longed for a similar adventure. A new start. A new outlet. A more creative expression.

I was contemplative. Why did I wait so long to make changes in my life? Why did it take me so long to brave up? I was envious of her guts and determination! I'm realizing I want more. I don't want to play small anymore. That everything I want, is on the other side of fear.

I have lived in fear for most of my life. My childhood paradigms have plagued me. You're not good enough. You're not smart enough. You're too fat, too short, not pretty enough. You're not educated enough. You don't have the right connections. You don't fit in. I've made many decisions based on those paradigms and subsequently have lead a tempered life. Status quo. Not bad but not great either. Until recently...

I've begun ridding myself of these paradigms. I no longer live in the past. I only learn from it. Acknowledging that I have these self defeating thought patterns was actually the first step in creating my "expansive" year. My say "yes" to life attitude. When you can identify your paradigms, you can alter your perceptions. Create better flow. This year I have broken through so many self defeating thought barriers and I have never been happier. I want to break through more. I am not the same person I was in January 2021! I'm a work in progress. (I believe we are a work in progress all our lives) I am reinventing myself and the changes are taking hold. They are apparent. I can't wait to see where I'll be at the end of this year. The possibilities are endless.

I want to brave up even more and lean into that confidence, resilience and fortitude that I've exhibited time and time again.

Hey, I left my husband and my home just having been told I had stage 4 cancer. That took courage!

I met a good guy (albeit temporary guy) this summer and we hit the road together. That took a leap of faith and it paid off big time. Igniting my passion (and I don't mean just sexually, I mean my passion for life, for experiences, for travel, for excitement, for something spectacular, something new).

I raised over $5000 for cancer research in 2021. When I set that goal I thought to myself I've set it too high. But I didn't listen to my inner dialogue and I worked at it, thought outside the box and reached the goal. That took determination.

I continue to eat healthy, exercise and take care of my whole self. That takes discipline.

And now my biggest goal is to create an online business that will afford me the luxury of time (time in that I can create my own schedule) and can work from anywhere in the world. An online business that will feed my creativity. An online business that will bring me financial security so that I needn't worry about money ever again. I so believe this is possible. And I don't believe it just for other people anymore, I BELIEVE IT FOR MYSELF.

Daily I gain insights and opportunity for growth. I've developed a strong sense of compassion and empathy. I learn from self study, courses and the people around me. I'm a student of life. I'm thankful for all the opportunities that continue to present themselves. I'm thankful for my work, the people in my life, my home and especially my health.

So you see, if not for my experiences thus far, I could not enjoy the journey I'm on or look forward to the adventures ahead.

I'm thankful for my Facebook friend who shared part of her journey with me, so that I could reflect on my own.

I'm going into 2022 with a determination and a belief so strong, that it is never too late to set big goals for yourself and to expect more from yourself and life. That making your dreams a reality is totally possible regardless of your age or circumstance.

I'm moving forward with Guts, Grace and Gratitude.